In defense of criticism

It's hard to hear that you're not perfect, that your writing needs work and that you could do better—much better. But, honestly, that what we all need to hear, at one time or another. As we all work toward the end goal of getting published, improvement is what we should all strive for. And yet, there is definitely a place for support, encouragement, and pats on the back.

So where do we find such support and criticism, all rolled up into one? In my experience, it comes from other writers, from those who understand the difficulties and who keep trucking along despite the discouragement.

I've found writers support groups (aka critique groups) both online and in the real world. I wouldn't say that one is necessarily better than the other because they both provide an essential ingredient for writing—help.

The first writing support I ever received was from an online group of authors at Authonomy. Before that, I had even been afraid to mention to people who knew me that I actually was a writer, though many guessed it.

But the most important lessons I learned from those writers didn't necessarily have to do with the mechanics of writing, though they certainly helped with that. More, it was good to know that others struggled with writing as much as I did, that they weren't sure how to take character A from point D to the end at point Z. That they had to work and struggle to find time to write, and that sometimes their spouses weren't completely supportive of their efforts.

I made friends—some of whom will be lifelong, I hope—with the same interests as myself and who taught me how to be a writer.

Another important part of what I learned was how to critique others' work in a productive and humane manner. I learned to give as well as I took, and in the process, I could see mistakes that I made just as much as the person I was correcting. Being an editor, I've learned this over and again: learning how to pick out mistakes as well as good points in others' writing makes me a better writer when I incorporate those lessons into my own work.

I participated in that online writing forum for a good six months, but the time then came for me to move on. So instead of closeting myself with my writing, I decided to join a new critique group that was forming in my area.

We meet every three weeks, and as we get together, we share not only our writing, but also our lives and dreams and hopes as writers, and as people. It is different sitting around a table reading aloud to others and hearing them give comments on what I could improve or what they like. There is an intimacy in sharing your words aloud with people who are quickly becoming friends.

The reason I bring this up at all is because of a tiny suggestion someone made during our writing group last night. After I had finished reading from my newest book, someone remarked that maybe I should think of fleshing out the story even more and including a book at the beginning of what has become a two-part series. I didn't like the idea much last night, but as I think of it more today, I'm realizing the potential in that idea.

In another writing lifetime, if I hadn't had someone to tell me that, I very well may have written the story only to struggle finding an agent because it wasn't quite right. The story didn't begin where it should have; there was more of the tale to tell. It might have taken me much longer to realize this on my own, but because I had another writer critique my work, they set a tiny spark of an idea in my head that will hopefully become an even greater story than what I had before.

So my advice to all writers is to find other writers with whom you can share your work. Critique as a group or individually, but listen to what they tell you, even if you don't want to hear it at first. That is one of the best ways we can learn and grow as writers, and it is also one of the best ways to motivate ourselves to keep writing and improve upon our craft.

Writing can be a very solitary act, but when we include others in our work, it becomes something even greater. And although support from family and spouses is good, they might not be as completely honest in their assessment of our work as another writer who understands what it means to put words to the page. Seek other writers out. I promise, you'll benefit immensely from it.