Is it wrong to want something so bad that it hurts when you don't have it? I wonder, because popular wisdom tells you to be driven, to seek for what you want. Okay, check. Got that.
But then it is also important to be zen, to let life float by you like a lazy stream, dipping your toes in but never getting fully wet. Alrighty. I can do that. Zen, peaceful, happy, asleeeeeep . . .
For me, I can't seem to have both at the same time. I'm a driven person. I'm also obsessive. I tend to want something and then put my whole force behind it until I either achieve it, burn myself out, or find something else I'd rather obsess about. And I'm really not kidding when I say that.
No medium ground here. Nosiree.
So where does that leave me, then? Driven, yes. Peaceful, sometimes (at least when "finding peace" is my obsession du jour). Happy, frequently. Unfulfilled, often.
The problem with being driven is that sometimes goals take longer to achieve than my current store of energy. Take, for example, my current obsession: writing books and getting them published.
So, I've written two books so far and have starts for twelve others. And no, I'm not kidding. I have the files on my computer ready for me to work on them. I plan to finish all of them at some point in my life, and that doesn't include new ideas that keep popping into my head even though I'm already busy enough with the ones I have. Ugh!
That leaves me with a whole lotta work and not nearly enough time to do it all in, especially when we factor in time to rewrite, edit, and revise. Plus the wonderful time spent querying and being rejected.
Sigh. This would probably be why I'm still single. I really don't have enough time to deal with a man and then work on my obsession. For the moment, I chose my obsession. But that's not to say that a man couldn't become an obsession later. It's happened before; I won't rule it out.
So the point of this ramble is, really, there's no point. I just needed to ramble a bit tonight. My obsession has worn me out for the evening, so I must to bed before exhaustion sets in. I hate it when I fall asleep in my regular clothes. Jeans just aren't very comfy.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Back in the saddle again . . .
Yes, I do think of blog titles in song. It's often the first thing that comes to me.
Anyway, this week has been momentous (for me at least) in that I've decided my book is about as ready as I can get it. This means QUERYING! Yep, I've started again, and it's such an exciting feeling. Even those first few rejections have a power to them, knowing that I'm out there doing what I need to be doing.
I won't bore you with query stats this time around, but just know that I'm busy doing everything I can to get Jessamine published. And the reason for that, my friends, can be found in last week's post. I want to get Jessamine published so she can be read, so the story can really come to life. I love it to much to let it sit in a box.
So watch out world, I'm coming!
Anyway, this week has been momentous (for me at least) in that I've decided my book is about as ready as I can get it. This means QUERYING! Yep, I've started again, and it's such an exciting feeling. Even those first few rejections have a power to them, knowing that I'm out there doing what I need to be doing.
I won't bore you with query stats this time around, but just know that I'm busy doing everything I can to get Jessamine published. And the reason for that, my friends, can be found in last week's post. I want to get Jessamine published so she can be read, so the story can really come to life. I love it to much to let it sit in a box.
So watch out world, I'm coming!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Creative Reading 201
Author Tracy Hickman (best known for the Dragon Lance books) gave a speech tonight as part of the BYU writers conference I've been attending this week. His words struck me so powerfully that I want to share the message with you as well as my thoughts on what this means for me and my writing.
Creative Reading 201:
An exploration of the reader as the author's partner in creation.
Story=meaning
No book lives until it is read. The reader partners in the experience in creating the written word. How that works is that the writer places symbols on a piece of paper, and the reader later comes along and interprets those symbols and make them come to life.
The meaningful experience in all literature takes place in the white space between the words. Minds connect the dots and fill in the blanks. It is what the reader interprets the words to mean, how they are personal, that creates a meaningful experience.
Literature is an art form where the final performance takes place while the original artist is not present. He cited an example from Stephen King's book On Writing. The experience of reading is like time travel back to when the author sat down at his desk and wrote it. They are experiencing the same things in one moment, even though those moments may be separated by years from when the author first wrote the book.
*It does not matter if you are published. Anyone can be published by ordering a copy of their book off Lulu. What matters is that you are read. It matters that your words come to life. Your words are dead until they are picked up by someone else.
We all read the same words, but what we bring to the story from our own experience makes it unique. It is the reader not the writer who creates the meaningful experience of the written word.
The only constant in the world is change. We're always moving forward, backward, or staying stagnant, but we are always moving in a direction. If we aren't moving forward, we are regressing and losing some of the knowledge we had. What we experience while reading a book cannot but help us change.
*Creation is more than knowing. It's doing something with what you know to change the world.
Tracy then shared a story about a soldier in Afghanistan who had read the Dragon Lance books and loved them. He took them with him as he was stationed so far from home. One day while on duty, he was shot in the back. The young soldier thought in that instant of what one character in the books would have done and he decided to act accordingly. Standing up even though his back was shattered, he warned his comrades and saved twelve lives that day.
I can't imagine that I'll ever have such a dramatic experience, but it still struck me that writing and books and stories can be so powerful when you touch a reader's life with your words.
Now for what this means to me. Today I was having a little mini crisis with my writing. Even though I've had close to 75 glowing comments from people who've read the first few chapters and loved the voice, and even though I've had two people read the whole thing and tell me they absolutely loved it, I started to doubt myself. I won't go into the reasons why, but let's just say I was feeling really down about my ability to write a book that I can actually get published.
And then I sat down to listen to Tracy speak, and I realized how selfish I was being. I was thinking of myself as the writer and not thinking of the reader. All I have to do is my very best with this book, and then I hand it over to the reader who will take that and create. There is something so incredibly powerful about that.
Really, that's why I started writing. I wanted to make a difference in people's lives—even if for just one person. I wanted to touch them, however briefly. But in all the hustle and bustle of "getting published" I forgot that.
So I am incredibly grateful for the lesson I learned tonight: I'm not in this by myself. It's a partnership I have with the readers. It doesn't matter if only two people ever read my whole book as long as it affects them, even if only for the entertainment value.
I don't know that I'll ever affect anyone's life so powerfully that they chose to save others' lives at risk to their own, but I hope that someone somewhere is better because of reading something that I write.
Creative Reading 201:
An exploration of the reader as the author's partner in creation.
Story=meaning
No book lives until it is read. The reader partners in the experience in creating the written word. How that works is that the writer places symbols on a piece of paper, and the reader later comes along and interprets those symbols and make them come to life.
The meaningful experience in all literature takes place in the white space between the words. Minds connect the dots and fill in the blanks. It is what the reader interprets the words to mean, how they are personal, that creates a meaningful experience.
Literature is an art form where the final performance takes place while the original artist is not present. He cited an example from Stephen King's book On Writing. The experience of reading is like time travel back to when the author sat down at his desk and wrote it. They are experiencing the same things in one moment, even though those moments may be separated by years from when the author first wrote the book.
*It does not matter if you are published. Anyone can be published by ordering a copy of their book off Lulu. What matters is that you are read. It matters that your words come to life. Your words are dead until they are picked up by someone else.
We all read the same words, but what we bring to the story from our own experience makes it unique. It is the reader not the writer who creates the meaningful experience of the written word.
The only constant in the world is change. We're always moving forward, backward, or staying stagnant, but we are always moving in a direction. If we aren't moving forward, we are regressing and losing some of the knowledge we had. What we experience while reading a book cannot but help us change.
*Creation is more than knowing. It's doing something with what you know to change the world.
Tracy then shared a story about a soldier in Afghanistan who had read the Dragon Lance books and loved them. He took them with him as he was stationed so far from home. One day while on duty, he was shot in the back. The young soldier thought in that instant of what one character in the books would have done and he decided to act accordingly. Standing up even though his back was shattered, he warned his comrades and saved twelve lives that day.
I can't imagine that I'll ever have such a dramatic experience, but it still struck me that writing and books and stories can be so powerful when you touch a reader's life with your words.
Now for what this means to me. Today I was having a little mini crisis with my writing. Even though I've had close to 75 glowing comments from people who've read the first few chapters and loved the voice, and even though I've had two people read the whole thing and tell me they absolutely loved it, I started to doubt myself. I won't go into the reasons why, but let's just say I was feeling really down about my ability to write a book that I can actually get published.
And then I sat down to listen to Tracy speak, and I realized how selfish I was being. I was thinking of myself as the writer and not thinking of the reader. All I have to do is my very best with this book, and then I hand it over to the reader who will take that and create. There is something so incredibly powerful about that.
Really, that's why I started writing. I wanted to make a difference in people's lives—even if for just one person. I wanted to touch them, however briefly. But in all the hustle and bustle of "getting published" I forgot that.
So I am incredibly grateful for the lesson I learned tonight: I'm not in this by myself. It's a partnership I have with the readers. It doesn't matter if only two people ever read my whole book as long as it affects them, even if only for the entertainment value.
I don't know that I'll ever affect anyone's life so powerfully that they chose to save others' lives at risk to their own, but I hope that someone somewhere is better because of reading something that I write.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Graduating
Up late tonight for reasons I won't go into (other than to say my mouth loves Indian food. Other parts of me . . . not so much). Anyway, while I'm sitting here wide awake, I was thinking about the first day of my writers conference. And the biggest feeling I have from it is that I've graduated.
Not in the traditional sense with a cap and gown, but more that I've moved on from the beginning stages of being a writer. A year ago, I'd never been to a conference and didn't know much about finding an agent or even how to edit my book, really. However, this has been an intensive year for me in many ways. I've put myself through my own writing boot camp.
It started with a conference last August put on by author Shannon Hale, and it really opened my eyes to what it meant being a writer. Before that, I'd been working on my book for nearly four years and was only halfway done. After getting a taste of the writing life, though, I was addicted. I wanted to know more and do more.
Within a month I found out about Authonomy, a writing peer review site (among other things). I made some wonderful friends and received invaluable feedback on my first manuscript. That gave me the impetus to finish the dang book so I could go on to editing the thing.
Then came another writers conference in November, this time with SCBWI, and this time also involving agents and editors from New York. I got some one-on-one time with an agent and received more valuable feedback.
Soon after I finished several rounds of edits on my ms and began querying. I went through another boot camp of sorts learning about agents and the querying process. I should say I was rather successful for a first book that took four years to write considering I'm still waiting to hear back from four agents who've requested the manuscript.
And now, six months later, I've written another book, this one in three weeks. Through the laborious process of writing that initiall took me four years, I learned some incredible lessons about how to write. Or, more importantly, how I write.
So, that brings me back to the writers conference today. As I sat there listening to the presenters going over information I'd learned nine months ago, and people asking the editors questions I knew all the answers to, I realized I've graduated from the stage of beginning writer. Oh, there are still plenty of things I've yet to learn, but I really feel that I've gained enough experience that I can't call myself a beginning writer. I'm moving well onto intermediate, even possibly toward advanced.
The moral of this story: writing and editing are about the doing. As Martha Mahalick, editor at Greenwillow, said today, editing is something you learn by experience. You gain knowledge by working with a mentor who shows you the ropes and guides you as you move along. Writing is exactly the same. First you have to write, and then you can get needed feedback on your writing. But you will never learn unless you start doing.
So writers, get out there. Learn by experience and from the experiences of others. Keep moving forward and someday you'll get to the point where you feel like you've graduated from being one tinkering with writing to being a real writer. And that is a wonderful realization.
Not in the traditional sense with a cap and gown, but more that I've moved on from the beginning stages of being a writer. A year ago, I'd never been to a conference and didn't know much about finding an agent or even how to edit my book, really. However, this has been an intensive year for me in many ways. I've put myself through my own writing boot camp.
It started with a conference last August put on by author Shannon Hale, and it really opened my eyes to what it meant being a writer. Before that, I'd been working on my book for nearly four years and was only halfway done. After getting a taste of the writing life, though, I was addicted. I wanted to know more and do more.
Within a month I found out about Authonomy, a writing peer review site (among other things). I made some wonderful friends and received invaluable feedback on my first manuscript. That gave me the impetus to finish the dang book so I could go on to editing the thing.
Then came another writers conference in November, this time with SCBWI, and this time also involving agents and editors from New York. I got some one-on-one time with an agent and received more valuable feedback.
Soon after I finished several rounds of edits on my ms and began querying. I went through another boot camp of sorts learning about agents and the querying process. I should say I was rather successful for a first book that took four years to write considering I'm still waiting to hear back from four agents who've requested the manuscript.
And now, six months later, I've written another book, this one in three weeks. Through the laborious process of writing that initiall took me four years, I learned some incredible lessons about how to write. Or, more importantly, how I write.
So, that brings me back to the writers conference today. As I sat there listening to the presenters going over information I'd learned nine months ago, and people asking the editors questions I knew all the answers to, I realized I've graduated from the stage of beginning writer. Oh, there are still plenty of things I've yet to learn, but I really feel that I've gained enough experience that I can't call myself a beginning writer. I'm moving well onto intermediate, even possibly toward advanced.
The moral of this story: writing and editing are about the doing. As Martha Mahalick, editor at Greenwillow, said today, editing is something you learn by experience. You gain knowledge by working with a mentor who shows you the ropes and guides you as you move along. Writing is exactly the same. First you have to write, and then you can get needed feedback on your writing. But you will never learn unless you start doing.
So writers, get out there. Learn by experience and from the experiences of others. Keep moving forward and someday you'll get to the point where you feel like you've graduated from being one tinkering with writing to being a real writer. And that is a wonderful realization.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Remarkably Jane
I've decided to add another facet to my blogging about writing, publishing, and all that jazz. Book reviews. You heard me right. In between all the other book talk, we might as well discuss some of the great books that are coming out as well as some overlooked gems.
Tonight, though, there is also a book giveaway! I have a signed copy of the book, which I will even have personalized for you since I know where to find the author. So, without further delay, Remarkably Jane: Notable Quotations on Jane Austen by Jennifer Adams.
Let's start with a quote, since the book is full of them.
What is it, then? I know I'm addicted to Jane's prose. There's something universal about her characters that sucks me into the story. Funny, sad, heartening, romantic, and just plain grand. I love the way she makes me believe in love and happy endings, even if she never found her own.
Eek. I don't like suffering, but really, what is love but pain? Enough about me, though. What does the acknowledged Jane-ite have to say?
Ah, now that's a lovely image. The book is full of them, as well as interesting tidbits that others have said about Jane. From writers to actors to those who adore Jane—or absolutely hate her—this book collects their thoughts on one of the great English novelists.
And hate—believe it or not—some did.
Tonight, though, there is also a book giveaway! I have a signed copy of the book, which I will even have personalized for you since I know where to find the author. So, without further delay, Remarkably Jane: Notable Quotations on Jane Austen by Jennifer Adams.
Let's start with a quote, since the book is full of them.
"What is all this about Jane Austen? What is there in her? What is it all about?"—Joseph Conrad, 1901, novelist
What is it, then? I know I'm addicted to Jane's prose. There's something universal about her characters that sucks me into the story. Funny, sad, heartening, romantic, and just plain grand. I love the way she makes me believe in love and happy endings, even if she never found her own.
"Austen tells us how much we have to suffer in order to find real love and truth as well as the pain of growing up. These conflicts in one way or another determine our lives."—Ang Lee, director of 1995 version of Sense and Sensibility
Eek. I don't like suffering, but really, what is love but pain? Enough about me, though. What does the acknowledged Jane-ite have to say?
"To those of us who love Jane Austen," Jennifer writes, "she is like the brightness of burnished silver. Something lovely, with sparkle, that makes our world more beautiful."
Ah, now that's a lovely image. The book is full of them, as well as interesting tidbits that others have said about Jane. From writers to actors to those who adore Jane—or absolutely hate her—this book collects their thoughts on one of the great English novelists.
And hate—believe it or not—some did.
Infamous curmudgeon Mark Twain said, "Every time I read Pride and Prejudice I want to dig her up and hit her over the skull with her own shin-bone."That quote makes me wonder, though, why he reads it again if he didn't like it the first time. For you, though I will leave you with these thoughts and a prize. To the person who leaves the best quote about Jane Austen in the comments, I'll send you a personalized copy of this beautiful book. And I've convinced the author to judge your entries. Oh, and I should say that the contest will end Saturday at midnight. (Whichever midnight you want.)
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