Villains in the real world

As a writer, I've had to learn a lot about creating villains in my stories. I used to think that purely evil villains without a hint of remorse were the worst ones to come up against, and thus the most interesting in literature. Like I said, I've learned a lot since then, and now I know that villains are almost never evil incarnate—at least if the villain is believable in a non-comic book world.

This relates to something I've seen a lot in the real world lately. (As a note: this is not a perfect analogy so don't take it literally.) In recent months the struggle to make gay marriage legal in the US, both sides have done a pretty good job with villainizing* the other as bad, and even evil. The people on each side are just that—people. They choose with which side they stand, and it is generally after thinking through the issue on a number of levels. While it is true that some are hateful, perhaps even a bit vile, that in no way says anything about the individuals of either group.

I'm not saying anything for or against any viewpoint here; what I want to point out is that by villainizing the opposition, we close off any opportunity for open and honest discourse, which may well in the end shift opinions and lead to some definitive progress.

Likewise, there are several companies and organizations that are under attack because one or more of their leaders or prominent members is strongly in favor of one party. Boycotts are proposed and enacted. People refuse to associate with even the mere mention of the group to show their disdain for the other's message. That is their choice, both of the group leaders and the boycotters.

I would, however, like to offer an alternative. Instead of closing ourselves against others and labeling those with a different system of values or beliefs as inherently wrong, why don't we loosen the barriers we've placed between us and treat each other as people who are doing the best they can with their lives? Someone may well be wrong in what they believe, but if the people who are right turn their backs and refuse to acknowledge the other, how will truth or right or goodness ever be shared with those who don't agree?

Again, I say nothing as to who or what is right, only that we can't create a better world if no one is willing to discuss things in a caring, gentle way. People believe what they do because of a multitude of experiences, thoughts, and people in their lives. Wouldn't it follow that for someone to change an opinion, they must have new experiences and thoughts introduced in a way that uplifts them? Tearing someone down will only lead to further entrenchment in their ideas; it does absolutely nothing to foster understanding.

So I say this: it's easy to paint someone who does not agree with us as a villain, as someone black-and-white evil like Cruella de Ville who enjoys killing puppies for fun. It's much harder to look at them as an individual who is trying to make tough decisions, just like we are, to see that there is a whole lot of gray mixed in with the black parts we don't like. Wouldn't it behoove us, then, to welcome discussion with them? To foster friendship and understanding so that humanity can grow together instead of apart?

I'm not a hero, nor am I a villain; I'm something inextricably more complicated than that, just as you are. As we all are.

*Yes, I am making up my own word, because I can't find one that describes exactly what I mean. Villainize: to make someone with a differing viewpoint into a villain.